Tuesday, July 6, 2010
Insomnia
Is there anything worse than not being able to sleep? I know there is, but right now with my entire house sleeping, I could not be more uneasy. It's early for me and Lance to be thinking about sleep, but lately one of us has been passing out by 10:30 pm. A sign maybe that we are wearing ourselves out a bit. My body is tired and my mind is racing nonstop. Thinking about Goose's upcoming birthday, the past year and being depressed, school, and then the other stuff that just creeps in and keeps me awake. It was this week last year that I called Paul while he was in France to talk about all the things racing in my head because I knew he would understand and calm me down. He did, as usual. How I wish it wasn't too late to call right now!
Sunday, July 4, 2010
Daybook~ Birthdays
For Today...July 4, 2010
Outside my window...it's dark and quiet. Any second I should hear fireworks. I stayed home with the baby and let Lance take the other three boys. Part of me is bummed, then I remember the downpours we've had all week and am happy not to be in soggy, wet grass.
I am listening to...Liz Phair. Part of me wants to just enjoy the silence that I haven't had all day, but Liz won out.
I am thankful...that Goose's eye is finally on the mend. He actually took his glasses off for most of the day. He is full of energy and was quite the spazz today. We created this flag today in honor of the 4th. I realize it's not quite accurate, but our platter wasn't big enough to make it perfect.
I am wondering...if I should have the birthday party I have been planning for myself. It's just girlfriends at the house, nothing big like I did for Lance's birthday. It's a great idea, I think, but here's the problem: we already have big plans with Paul and Brian, which means I am already spending money on my birthday. I don't know that I can really justify spending more money on myself. Don't get me wrong, I love having money spent on me, just not from my bank account. Decisions, decisions...
Around the house...my curtains arrived and I've been wondering for a week if they can be ironed. My sister-in-law took the time to look at the tag and let me know that I need to get them dry cleaned. I need to get an iron rod, then find someone to install them because we don't do things like that around here.
From the kitchen...I found some great recipes to try for the summer, and I'm excited about having new food. I have to stick with a menu or we just don't eat well. I had the best strawberries today. Now if only I could buy a good watermelon. I have taken so many back to the stores because they sucked. Yes, I am one of those women.
One of my favorite things...my boys running around and having a blast. Most days they are so much fun. I can just see their faces at the fireworks right now. Our neighbor gave them glow sticks for tonight and they were so excited about them. Even Squirt.
I am grateful for...family, bbq's, summer fruit, friends that listen when I'm manic and a clean house
Towards Rhythm and Beauty...I love the season our family is in right now. I feel a real happiness in our life these days and am not looking forward to any changes.
A few plans for the week...it's time to plan for the birthday boys. We have three birthdays to celebrate this week!
A picture thought I am sharing...
Outside my window...it's dark and quiet. Any second I should hear fireworks. I stayed home with the baby and let Lance take the other three boys. Part of me is bummed, then I remember the downpours we've had all week and am happy not to be in soggy, wet grass.
I am listening to...Liz Phair. Part of me wants to just enjoy the silence that I haven't had all day, but Liz won out.
I am thankful...that Goose's eye is finally on the mend. He actually took his glasses off for most of the day. He is full of energy and was quite the spazz today. We created this flag today in honor of the 4th. I realize it's not quite accurate, but our platter wasn't big enough to make it perfect.
I am wondering...if I should have the birthday party I have been planning for myself. It's just girlfriends at the house, nothing big like I did for Lance's birthday. It's a great idea, I think, but here's the problem: we already have big plans with Paul and Brian, which means I am already spending money on my birthday. I don't know that I can really justify spending more money on myself. Don't get me wrong, I love having money spent on me, just not from my bank account. Decisions, decisions...
Around the house...my curtains arrived and I've been wondering for a week if they can be ironed. My sister-in-law took the time to look at the tag and let me know that I need to get them dry cleaned. I need to get an iron rod, then find someone to install them because we don't do things like that around here.
From the kitchen...I found some great recipes to try for the summer, and I'm excited about having new food. I have to stick with a menu or we just don't eat well. I had the best strawberries today. Now if only I could buy a good watermelon. I have taken so many back to the stores because they sucked. Yes, I am one of those women.
One of my favorite things...my boys running around and having a blast. Most days they are so much fun. I can just see their faces at the fireworks right now. Our neighbor gave them glow sticks for tonight and they were so excited about them. Even Squirt.
I am grateful for...family, bbq's, summer fruit, friends that listen when I'm manic and a clean house
Towards Rhythm and Beauty...I love the season our family is in right now. I feel a real happiness in our life these days and am not looking forward to any changes.
A few plans for the week...it's time to plan for the birthday boys. We have three birthdays to celebrate this week!
A picture thought I am sharing...
My 4th of July boys. I didn't make Squirt match the boys this year.
Saturday, July 3, 2010
Rain, Rain Go Away
This weather has me on the verge of being dangerously bored. Please go away rain!
Friday, July 2, 2010
Pet Peeve
It's that time, we have two, three if you count me, birthdays coming up this month. "I need ideas for gifts". I hate this statement. I bust my ass coming up with gift ideas for my kids. To have to think of gifts for other people to buy my kids drives me effing batty. I know people only want to give gifts that the kids need or want, but I don't have the time to go over every gift and look at the ratings, order it online and then wrap it for other people. And even if I did, I don't want to do it. I spend a lot of time picking out gifts for other people all the time and if I'm having a problem, I look online for ideas. I don't rely on someone else for ideas without trying really hard to find something on my own. And I give a gift receipt so they can return it if they don't like it.
So for those questions that are coming, and I know they are since I've already had it twice today: no electronic toys, even learning toys. I promise we don't need them nor will we use them. We like books, books that are level 3.2 on the back for Goose and two years and up for the baby. We like pretend, which means costumes. We like puzzles as in 100 piece puzzles. Maybe a cool t-shirt. Maybe a family membership to the symphony this year or tickets to a football game. Tuition for a mommy and me class. We have no room for anything more, and I hate for the kids to receive so much when we are already so blessed.
As for me, I want new bookshelves, so money is always a good option!
So for those questions that are coming, and I know they are since I've already had it twice today: no electronic toys, even learning toys. I promise we don't need them nor will we use them. We like books, books that are level 3.2 on the back for Goose and two years and up for the baby. We like pretend, which means costumes. We like puzzles as in 100 piece puzzles. Maybe a cool t-shirt. Maybe a family membership to the symphony this year or tickets to a football game. Tuition for a mommy and me class. We have no room for anything more, and I hate for the kids to receive so much when we are already so blessed.
As for me, I want new bookshelves, so money is always a good option!
Thursday, July 1, 2010
Wedding Photos
My dear priest came to pray with me before the wedding. I think Lance told him I was stressed!
Our vows and lasso
Our wedding party, notice no flower girl, I got so much shit for this.
We took most pictures before the ceremony and our smiles are much different after the ceremony.
Mr. and Mrs. Lance Zierlein
I love this picture, not sure why. My favorite picture of me and Lance is of us praying for Our Lady's intercession; I can't find it. Who thinks I haven't gone crazy this week looking for it?!
Love Note
I was finally able to scan some pictures from our wedding to share. I don't really feel old, but then I realize that my wedding pictures have to be scanned because the photographer used actual film and well, I feel slightly dated. This week was supposed to be the perfect week and has turned out less than that. We have Goose's eye problem, Squirt's nose acting up more than usual and crappy weather. But this is what life is all about. It's not always movies, massages and romantic dinners. Not when you have a family. And there is nothing I would rather have than my family. The family I have because I married a guy named Lance. A guy I heard on the radio and decided I needed to meet. The guy who sent me an email the night we met and has been with me since then.
Was it love at first sight? No, I just thought he was hot and funny and different from what I had had. Someone worth taking a chance on, a chance to look forward and not back. Life isn't always easy for us, but there is no one else I would rather share life's joys and frustrations with than Lance. I never thought any guy could measure up to what I wanted. I remember somebody telling me to pray that my St. Joseph would come my way. I prayed and waited. And waited and waited. Then prayed some more. He was so worth the wait. I guess after a week like this, which wasn't terribly bad just not what we expected and extremely worrisome with Goose, at the end of the day, I am happy to fall into bed with you, Lance. Thank you for being my St. Joseph, thank you for my children, thank you for still missing our lost ones and grieving when I can't do it and thank you for the love and care you give me. I love you so very much.
Was it love at first sight? No, I just thought he was hot and funny and different from what I had had. Someone worth taking a chance on, a chance to look forward and not back. Life isn't always easy for us, but there is no one else I would rather share life's joys and frustrations with than Lance. I never thought any guy could measure up to what I wanted. I remember somebody telling me to pray that my St. Joseph would come my way. I prayed and waited. And waited and waited. Then prayed some more. He was so worth the wait. I guess after a week like this, which wasn't terribly bad just not what we expected and extremely worrisome with Goose, at the end of the day, I am happy to fall into bed with you, Lance. Thank you for being my St. Joseph, thank you for my children, thank you for still missing our lost ones and grieving when I can't do it and thank you for the love and care you give me. I love you so very much.
Boys and Cars
Squirt is obsessed with cars, has been for years and is now passing on that love to the little boys. Today, I had to take everyone to the doctor with me and all I heard the entire time I was driving was "look, a Honda", "there's a Chevy", "a Cadillac" and so on. Squirt is so proud of himself for teaching his brothers how to recognize cars.
He started slow teaching them about sports cars. Ferraris, Porsches and Bugattis. The boys are even learning where these cars are made. Of course, it drives him crazy when the kids come home telling him that they saw four Ferraris AND a Bugatti. (I don't even know what that damn car looks like!) When I asked him why he gets so upset when they think they see a certain car, he just said that he wants them to be accurate. I can't say I blame him. Hopefully, they will all realize that a sports car is not in any of their futures until they are buying it themselves.
He started slow teaching them about sports cars. Ferraris, Porsches and Bugattis. The boys are even learning where these cars are made. Of course, it drives him crazy when the kids come home telling him that they saw four Ferraris AND a Bugatti. (I don't even know what that damn car looks like!) When I asked him why he gets so upset when they think they see a certain car, he just said that he wants them to be accurate. I can't say I blame him. Hopefully, they will all realize that a sports car is not in any of their futures until they are buying it themselves.
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