I think I have the baby blues regarding the explosion of pink that is about to become my home. The more people get excited, the more annoyed I am getting. I can't explain it. I am sure it has to do with me being defensive about having all boys. You have no idea how tired I get of people "feeling sorry for me for having four boys", asking "will you just die if you have another boy". It drives me insane. I love my boys and think they are almost perfect. Basically, I have become the person I was worried Lance would be if we had another boy. And I kind of feel bad, not much, but a little. I mean, how sweet was it today when I ran to the gym to tell the caretakers about the baby and they all asked if they could hug me and one had tears in her eyes. And then there is my doctor who everyone knows I adore, who also started crying.
The reality is that having more than the "normal" amount of children is special to begin with, but to have four children all the same gender is really special and different and I liked it. Come December, I won't be part of that club anymore. I am sure I'll be ready for the little girl that will join our family, but a part of me will feel bittersweet to leave this club I've been fortunate to be a part of for the last several years.